The authority of authorship

Apparently you get out what you put in but I’m not so sure.
Sometimes I do a lot, more often than not I manage a few paragraphs before the opaque mist fuzzies up my cells and continuity drifts but whatever, the end result is the same because when I’m nearing completion of a book there’s no way of telling where those fuzzy days are compared to the days like this afternoon when I got straight into it and got some heavy-ass shhhh on the page. I like that I’m in the lucky position of having no audience and no expectations placed on me so I can just get on with writing whatever feels right.
This latest, Bus-cut trees, is a real release from the normal strictures, freeform expression, no rules, no restrictions although there is definitely a flow in the right direction but I don’t know what I’m doing or where it’s going and yet still the flow carries me. Ideas formulate as I go, maybe I’ll take them on, maybe not. When you have no expectation of anyone reading or judging your work it doesn’t matter.
I’m going to have a try at some poetry in amongst the rest of the madness I’ve been writing, my character is going to try and express his feelings about love, death and the ability to feel love whilst inducing death. It’s going to be great and if not…whatever.
What; you’re my mother now?


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